bloodsingsblood -- Prompt 25.5 -- Write a letter...

25.5 : Write a letter to someone and tell them something you've always wanted to say.



Dean,

I bet you never thought you'd get an actual written letter from me, huh? I guess that makes two of us because I never thought I'd be writing one to you. Letters have never really been my thing, but this one seemed too important for me not to write it. I'm sitting upstairs in this lonely room and pretending that I'm getting sleep. You're down the hall or downstairs -- I don't know which -- and it's mostly because I shot you down by spouting some bullshit about self-respect. Tomorrow, we have a war to fight and it may be the last day any of us see.

If you're actually holding this, it means that something really bad happened and I didn't make it. If that's true, then there are two very important things that you need to know.

First of all, It's Not Your Fault. I know you, Dean, and no matter how much you like to make people think you're blowing things off, I know that you're not. You just don't like people to see that more serious side of you. You spent so many years being the anchor for your dad and you don't wear your emotions on your sleeve like Sammy. And because I know you, I know that right now you are blaming yourself and beating yourself up in some private place because of whatever has happened to me. So, let me repeat this again: It Is Not Your Fault. I chose this life, Dean, and I made the choice to fight this battle with you. How many girls can say that they were able to make a last stand against the legions of Hell with the guy they loved?

And that's the second thing that you need to know. I Love You, Dean. I never told you what my feelings were, and didn't correct you when you assumed that my earlier behavior over the years was only attraction and nothing deeper. That's on me. I never wanted you to know that it went deeper than that because I didn't want to be just one of those temporary hook-ups that hunters sometimes have because they're lonely. I didn't want that for either of us, and now I'm shouldering a lot of regrets because I never took that leap of faith with you or took a chance on having just a hook-up. I didn't want you to know how deeply entrenched in my heart you were -- and now I wish I had.

I want you to do something for me, Dean. With or without me, I want you to kick Lucifer's ass. Then, I want you to try and make yourself a normal life somewhere and be happy. I can't think of anyone who deserves a happy and normal kind of life more than you. End this with Lucifer and then walk away. You've done much more than anyone can and you've done everything that the powers that are running this show have asked of you.

And no matter what, know that you came first with someone, Dean. You came first with me. You didn't take second place to a hunt or vengeance or a demon where I was concerned. You came first in someone's life for a change.

~Jo



Muse: Jo Harvelle
Fandom: Supernatural
Words: 546

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Black was the color that she knew she would always associate with him.

The first time she saw him, he was wearing a rather battered black leather jacket, and even being held on the business end of a rifle, his shoulders still filled out the jacket. Later, when she was outside talking to him, the Impala that he was so protective of was also a black color.

However, it wasn't the color of his jacket or the car that caused her to start associating black with him. It was the dark look she could see in his eyes every time he talked about the demon that had killed his mom... and what had happened with his dad. It was a look she had glimpsed in the eyes of other hunters, but there was something about seeing it in his that threw her a little that first time.

It wasn't that she was expecting that darkness in his eyes to turn on anyone close to him, it was that she worried he would get swallowed up by the blackness that she saw. It was something that she didn't want to happen to him.

Jo Harvelle // 192 Words // Supernatural